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Is it Hive Mind or Is There a Handbook? Males Penetrating Female-Only E-Space
So, I’ve been spending a little time over on Saidit talking with some truly interesting women from around the world. I like it. Different ages and cultures thinking about the same issues; I love it when a woman makes a comment that makes me think more deeply about something I’ve either not thought much about before or that helps me clarify my own position. You’re never too old or too experienced to develop… or change! There are some other women there too – they seem young, unfocused, and angry (justifiably so; I have zero problem with righteous anger) who are likely finally finding a place to voice their rage without being censored. But I like discussion of the calmer sort, if I’m up for interaction at all. Don’t get me wrong, I have rage, and I let her out for a stomp every once in a while, even though it’s blood she craves at times…
I’ve hung out on different forums at different times, very often as a lurker. I don’t often participate because what’s the point? Most places are run by men and heavily populated by men and their cockpuppets. You either get censored, ignored or attacked when you comment as a non-handmaiden. Pointless to waste your energy. But so far the saidit blackpill threads seem to be doing alright, if so far under-utilized. If you’re reading this and haven’t been over yet, give it a try. You might find a topic worth talking about. There are a few different, related threads. Just explore.
One thing you will find, however, no matter which forum you find yourself on, is that if there is a woman-only space or a woman-pertinent topic, males will come and jizz all over it. And no matter where they are from or what age they are, they are all exactly the same. It is a bit eerie actually, but as a result, they are completely predictable. I’m trying to figure out whether all males share a mind or whether they are all given a handbook at birth: “How to derail a discussion group of women in the most male way possible in 10 easy steps”. I’m going to ignore the Neanderthal infiltrator. He is the guy who just stomps in and announces that all women are bitches or that women have easier lives than men. And then he just waits for women to freak out (which they usually don’t because they’ve encountered this asshole a million times before). No, today, I’m focusing on the guy who saunters in and attempts a dialogue. There are a million of these guys too, but they are often a little more successful at derailing women. Here’s how it always goes:
- Male announces himself. “Greetings. I’m Obi-Wan Kenobi , but you can call me Humble Scrote. I’m just a simple, innocent male, and I wanted to ask a question to all you wise women. You can feel free to ignore me, but I would love it if you would educate me on X, Y, Z topic. I’m confused.” So, note a few things here: the male must announce himself – unlike any of the women in the group, even if they haven’t posted before. He usually tells everyone he is male and makes some self-deprecating comment to show women he doesn’t feel superior to them (ahem… that’s coming later). He also invites the women to completely ignore him, while at the same time plowing on with an endless paragraph that demands that they filter through the jizzy mess, unable to ignore him. In the humble paragraph, it is clear that despite what his actual words say, he does, in fact, expect the group to completely shift focus to him, and often the question(s) he has isn’t directly tied to the initial topic of the post.
- Reactions: Someone always reacts to the Nice Guy TM. There is at least one naïve and/or well-trained ‘nice’ woman who welcomes the penis to the group. He is being so sweet and humble, after all, so he can’t be one of ‘those guys’. (Not all men!) Women are expected to be nice and helpful, and most importantly, not to have boundaries. It is okay to interrupt women and demand their attention. Men don’t see this as being on the same spectrum as rape, unwanted touching, taking up more than one’s share of space on buses or shared seating, etc. But it is all part of the male dominance-female subservience system. Women don’t have boundaries. Men have the right to be everywhere. So you’ll get a nice welcoming woman, thrilled with the opportunity to help a male understand what women are about, who usually asks penis master to clarify something or to spell out his question, if he didn’t already do so upon flouncing into the e-space. You will also often get at least one awesome woman who will address the intruder by his real name, usually something like Scrote or Moid. Welcoming Woman is usually quicker on the draw, though, so by the time the Warrior Woman has responded, dick-for-brains has usually written at least 2-3 long paragraphs outlining his confusion or clarifying how fucking amazing he is (Not all men!).
- Then the scrote sees the unwelcoming comment, and he shows his real face. Holy shit! He isn’t a Nice Guy TM. Or rather, he is a Nice Guy, but the bitch who is biting his head off is making him respond like some rapey turd. How can you blame him? How else is he to respond to someone who is clearly a man-hating lesbian, and who likely has emasculating testicle shears hanging just inside the front door of her apartment? Is he supposed to just leave the forum? Hell no! He has every right to be in the women’s space derailing everyone from the interesting topic they were discussing and demanding all eyes turned to him as he spins in a testosterific cloud of confusion. Stop talking and just listen and learn by reading? Hell no! He has a right to voice his opinions and ask his questions! How dare these women attack him. He is suddenly a victim and he lashes out like all men know how to do (again, is it hivemind or is there a bloody handbook on this???) His initial response is usually along the lines of “What is your problem? / What did I do??? ” Totally eye-blinkingly innocent.
- Then it goes on. It becomes quickly apparent that the Scrotal Mess isn’t there to be educated. What he really wanted to do was to point out that feminists are misinterpreting the state of the world. Or most men aren’t what the actual data available publicly say they are. Or most men don’t hate women, and the men who do hate women don’t hate them 100%, maybe just like 25% or something (there is always a statistic in there somewhere). Or women have more power than men these days. Or, I mean pick something – it almost always has something to do with women being stupid or privileged in some way, and men are innocent victims suffering in this world because of mean feminists who are mean. Ruining everything! Waaaah!
- There may be some response from the ass-kicking forum defenders telling Sir-Masturbates-Alot to fuck off. The initially welcoming woman has usually kept out of things – she is probably confused. (Why are you attacking him…???) And the man then goes on to do at least one of the following: a) He deposits a man-turd in the form of a warning, e.g., “With this attitude, you will quickly find yourself with few allies.” “You’ll never make progress if you don’t include ME (and other Nice Feminist Guys) in your endeavours.” b) He reinforces his victim status, even though he was the one to penetrate the women, I mean the women’s discussion group. “Geez, bite my head off. I was just trying to learn/ask a simple (multi-paragraph) question.” or c) He’ll make threats and use hate speech. This is self-explanatory. We’ve all seen Nice Guys TM wish us dead or raped. They’ve all reported US for hate speech and tried to get us censored, often successfully. They’ve all called us cunts and bitches and feminazis and whores and TERFs and Karens and the list is endless.
- Scrote eventually fucks off. He is often banned if there is a moderator. But he may come back with a different user name. Sometimes it is hard to tell, they all sound the fucking same. And all women are left knowing that no matter where they are, whether it be online or in the meat world, they will always be attacked by men. Women are just not allowed to speak publicly without some fucking man policing the whole damned thing and thinking that his opinion is more important than women’s and that his demand for attention and service are vastly more urgent and important than the need for women to speak freely and without interference about the things that concern their lives most seriously.
And as a close, please note that I have lurked on blogs representing special interest groups, and you don’t see this level of infiltration and sense of entitlement by members that wouldn’t normally be included in that group. This seems only to apply to women as a class.
It is up to you to decide why all these guys sound the same. Are men born into a hivemind situation or are they handed a manual at birth that teaches them how to dominate women, including in e-forums? The only thing I know for certain is that it is just best not to respond to them. They hate it and will go away faster.
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How to Respond to Male ‘Feminists’
I’m going to enter this under my ‘Conversations with Men‘ series for obvious reasons, although I’ll follow a slightly different format than I usually do for posts in that category.
If you’ve been reading along, you’ll know that not only do I assert that male feminists don’t and can’t exist, but I really dislike men who apply that label to themselves. Further, I’m not too keen on the women, including supposed feminists (ffs!), who shower praise and blow jobs on these self-professed activist woman-lovers either, but I get why they do this even if it is enormously damaging to women.
I’ve written about these creeps before:
They Don’t Do It Because They Care: Where I talk about why men join the helping professions, activism, and volunteer organizations.
Is It A Necessary Concession? Where I talk about the hidden, selfish agenda underneath the male feminist costume.
Truth Will Out: Where I talk about how you can reveal the misogynist turd that is at the heart of the majority of male feminists?
Today, I want to demonstrate how to respond to a male ‘feminist’ who tries to ‘engage’ you in dialogue. The thing with most male feminists is that they always end up in the same place using the same set of tactics. Most of them, with their keen male predatory radar, will sniff out real feminists. What are real feminists? There aren’t many around despite the label starting to become fashionable again for pole dancers and identity politickers. Real feminists are those radical women who are consistent in their belief that men as a class oppress women as a class on the very basis of sex. Real feminists name the problem: men. Real feminists understand the interplay of biology and socialization, and that men are free to be their biologically violent selves and have created a society that supports this through socialization, while women are NOT free to be their natural selves and constantly fight against gender socialization and comply against their will to attempt to avoid male violence.
So having zoned in on a real feminist, the male feminist starts a conversation. It might start out in a seemingly innocent or friendly way, but it quickly devolves into antagonism. (Or he might just dive right in.) The dude just can’t help himself. You see, men, no matter how human rightsy they say they might be, are not on board with radical feminist theory because they don’t see themselves as part of class, male. They are special, different. And they neeeeeed to make you see that you’re doing feminism wrong. Your thinking is wrong. You’re mean. You’re rigid. You’re responsible for everything bad in the world. You’re not doing enough to help women less fortunate. You… you’re something. And whatever it is, you are wrong and you should feel ashamed and guilty. Luckily, he is there to set you on the right path. And if you want to help him out somehow to show your thanks, well, you are free (free!!!) to do so.
Where most women, even real feminists, go wrong is in dealing with these douchebags. Even the most hard lined feminists have been socialized from birth as females to be constantly on the defensive. Being a woman means constantly being under attack in many ways. So women will spend enormous amounts of energy trying to explain themselves. No, I’m not a man-hater. No, I’m not humourless. No, I’m not violent. No, I’m not… oh, please just stop. I’m sorry I’m alive.
It is endless, and even staunch feminists cave under this relentless apologizing, self-defense, and explaining. We’ve seen bizarre capitulations by women once seen to hold the flag of feminism. I’m sure you can think of a few.
Online, these dickheads are even worse. They’ll flounce into a women’s space like the king of the castle and pounce on a feminist. They’ll either ask short, snarky, derailing questions, or they will lay it on thick with multi-paragraph mansplanations. What is expected is that all interested women drop everything they’re doing to address the male feminist’s concerns, defend their positions, and answer his stupid questions.
I propose something different, and I’ll illustrate with a real example put in my lap a few days ago.
~~
I left a comment on one of the blogs I follow. I can’t remember the exact topic, but it had something to do with male ‘feminists’. My comment was:
“Just as there is no such thing as a woman with a penis, there is no such thing as a male feminist.”
A concerned penis-brain responded to me, quoted the second half of my comment “there is no such thing as a male feminist”, and then said “Really?”
I did what most women automatically do, I wrote a draft explaining my position and a few other choice things. And then I stopped. This asshole spent two seconds to write one snarky word that demanded that I defend myself. And I almost fell for it. I found that as I was writing my answer, my stress level increased, and my anger flared. And then all became clear.
I decided to respond. And I responded in kind.
“Yup.”
And it felt good. It felt right. And he didn’t engage me further, which was exactly the right thing to happen. Some people might include their blog address or specific posts, and let the dude know that the argument is laid out there. I don’t bother. This kind of guy isn’t interested in feminism, and he will definitely not take the time to read your blog or post. He is looking to antagonize. He is looking for followers and praise and possibly a liberal woman who will be feisty, but who will still suck his dick because he is so fucking awesome.
In other words, not a feminist. Feminism isn’t about individualism, selfishness, or men/male ‘needs’. It is about women as a class. And if men want to be feminist allies/supporters (not feminists), they should go educate men, not spend time on feminist blogs antagonizing already overburdened, harassed women.
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Moron of the Day
If only there were only one moron per day, we all could rest a little easier. But alas, they exist everywhere and the more moronic they are, the more they feel they need to speak.
Anyhow, some background to the moron I managed to run into online, mid-coffee, on this lovely Saturday morning.
The internet is a strange place. Unlike in the real world (for the most part), online, it takes about 3 seconds for one to start out in one place with specific intentions, and then somehow end up in the middle of one of your worst nightmares. And so it happened today. I was googling something, and magically found myself on a pro-capitalism site run by a moron that sums up capitalism in his sidebar in the form of a busty, be-bra’d bimbo holding up an ‘I’m your biggest fan’ poster. Capitalism can only exist when women are enslaved. Good job, Captain Obvious. You made your point without having to even speak!
But that is not the moron I’m talking about – although he does qualify. Morons tend to attract further morons, and no place loves morons more than comments sections on moronic blogs.
Click to the ‘About’ page. And moronic comment gold! Especially this one, whom I will call Dumbass.
I have never found a liberal to admit they are wrong or concede to a debate especially feminazis. They just keep just keep doing attack after attack and unless the fight was physical, it would never end. These liberals today are radical extremist and we have to bend to them is what our society preaches. How come society did not tolerate and still does not tolerate Nazis but embraces radical liberals and feminazis?
We’ve got the classic Liberal hate. But that shit is meaningless to me. Generic American Liberals are frequently as stoopid and misogynistic as Conservatives or Libertarians. And those labels are often meaningless and defined differently outside the centre of the world (aka the USA).
No, I’m talking about the misogyny, which is naturally part of the set meal when you go for the Capitalist Dude lunch special. First, we’ve got usage of the meaningless term ‘feminazi’. It’s so overused that it’s getting old. Although we all know it is an insult directed at women, the term doesn’t actually make sense. And as Capitalist Dumbass so blatantly displays through what I’m sure he feels is a Clever Intellectual Question, he doesn’t even understand what Nazis are. This is what happens when a) you’re not properly educated, b) you’re privileged (person who got into a university simply because he had money, pasty skin, and a penis, but alas, no brain), and c) you can’t keep your damned mouth shut even when you don’t know what you’re talking about.
To answer the question posed by Dumbass, We don’t/didn’t tolerate Nazis because they committed genocide, targeting Jewish people, gay people, and non-White people (some of whom overlapped). You know, human rights abuses. Radical Liberals and ‘feminazis’ – or let’s use the correct word, Radical Feminists – fight for human rights. The former may have any number of oppressed groups at its focus or may focus on protecting the environment rather than oppression, while Radical Feminists focus on liberating women from sex-based oppression, while supporting intersectional issues (race, class, orientation, etc.). So to make it clear for Dumbass, Fighting for human rights is a GOOD THING. Genocide is a BAD THING.
But I’m not sure if feminists are ’embraced’ as, Dumbass asserts. His comment is representative of the majority of men in the world and some women, and their hate speech – and it is hate speech to the letter – is tolerated and even embraced.
In short, hate-spewing, capitalist windbags – even genocide-supporting ones – are still tolerated and even embraced. Feminists are derided, threatened, and harmed daily, unprotected from hate speech (although women don’t classify as an oppressed group anywhere, so legally, hate speech directed at them isn’t hate speech and cannot be prosecuted). They are not embraced.
—
ps: I’m not linking to this web site because a) I have no intention of driving traffic to it, and b) through the magic of the internet, you’ll find it or one of the countless millions like it within 3 seconds all by yourself. Besides, I included a hint above 😉
Let’s Kick Things Off
Let’s face it. It is NOT easy being a woman in this world. It never has been, and still isn’t. When compared to all other oppressed groups, women have been enslaved the longest, progress towards their liberation has been the slowest, and it is the group with the largest number of its members refusing to fight back, remaining brainwashed into compliance and self-sabotage. Misogyny has lived and still thrives in all cultures, all nations, all eras, and all age groups.
Misogyny is so ingrained that most people don’t even notice most of it. When it is noticed, many people rationalize it away or develop defense mechanisms to cope with it. Even egregious examples of woman-hate are held untouchable, and those who dare to expose it are attacked mercilessly, even by the oppressed themselves.
Even in this supposedly enlightened day and age (a common way to view one’s current times, despite all evidence to the contrary), the willingness to see women as full human beings doesn’t exist. Those who fight for this very logical wish to be human are castigated, seen as evil pariahs, and likened to the most psychopathic mass murderers in history.
Internet feminism has served to get the word out there. It is still a dangerous, exhausting business, however. Women who speak and who have opinions are universally hated and are at the receiving end of some horrific backlash. I’ve noticed so many feminist sites start up and then die off after a few years. My guess is that having to constantly deal with the ignorance and hate and violence of men online in addition to that which every woman endures in daily life eventually breaks the writers. Part of the problem, I posit, is allowing discussion. Discussion is important for women, but opening up a forum for this online also attracts evil in the form of ignorant men (and some women who don’t want to accept reality). Constantly moderating and being bombarded with idiocy and violence is very psychologically difficult. Only a superwoman could remain immune. And so, my current policy is to write, but disallow comments/discussion. It is for my self-preservation. Writing is healing and intellectual, and getting the words out and repeating the message trumps any secondary need to interact, at this point. If someone reads and learns, that is a bonus.
I link to other feminist sites (in the sidebar) where discussion is possible to varying degrees. Each writer chooses her level of willingness to interact with men who, generally speaking, are too emotional, impulsive, and illogical to realize that they should just be reading and learning.
Story Ending Never 
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